Monday, April 20, 2009

Happy Birthday to Me!


I will be 26 in exactly one week and I just received the most fabulous news - I will be joining the millions of other Americans - in the unemployment FUCKING line. YAAAY!

FUCK. SHIT. ASS. BITCH. MOTHERFUCKING WHORES!

I was just trall-la-la-ing about my day when I was called into the office maybe an hour ago and given the "we're just not doing very well and we can't afford your position anymore" speech out of the blue. I sat there and listened, got up and left the office, sat silently and gathered my things while people tried to "explain" and left without even screaming "FUCK YOU!" or firebombing the building. I'd say it was a fairly successful first lay off.

I had a perfectly good job six months ago - stressful and crappy paying, but still sustainable job - that I left voluntarily for these fucking assholes and now I'm completely fucked. Why in the fuck did they even hire me in the first place? How many times can I use the word 'fuck' in one paragraph?

Then I went straight to my parents' house where I wailed lots of 'fucks' and 'goddammits' at my comforting mother.

Is it bad that I can't stop crying? I'm such a pansy.

Tonight, Jameson Irish Whiskey is my friend. Tomorrow, my finances, Career Builder, the unemployment office and my resume will hopefully be my friend too, but they'll probably fuck me as well. FUCK.

6 comments:

Prosy said...

Fuck. Get some smokes too. And some Ben & Jerrys.

Kate said...

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck. I'll keep my eyes peeled for openings around here...

SassyLittleGinger said...

well fuck fuck fuck. really the best word for that situation. i hope everything works out for you, i'm sure you will do just fine!

Steam Me Up, Kid said...

Fuckity fuck. Get yourself nice and drunk, and you'll feel better tomorrow.

Love,
The bad advice fairy

thatsilverlining said...

I did pretty much the exact same thing with my layoff. They hired me to work 6 months and then decided that they couldn't afford me. Thanks a lot, assholes.

I am sending you a virtual bottle of booze. Drink up.

Trisha Shrum said...

Hey there... Sorry to hear the news. :( You're a fantastic writer and you'll find plenty of people who want to pay you to do it. Or you could always hide from the recession in graduate school...

 

View my page on Twenty Something Bloggers